I know, I know, it’s been ages since I posted anything. I’m sorry, but I will make it up to you.
Today’s blog post comes from something that I know many people struggle with, I know I sure do, and that is wether we’re being needy or not. How often do we not send that message, and not have that conversation because ‘I’m just being needy, I can’t say that’? I’m sorry but how do you define needy, because in my opinion, wanting somebody to share their feelings with you, or telling you occasionally how much you mean to them is not needy, it’s merely apart of being in a relationship. So lets define being needy.
According to Urban dictionary being needy is “Requiring attention beyond what is normative. Getting anxious when someone doesn’t reply to you on MSN after 15 seconds is being needy.” Ok so according to them being needy is freaking out because your boyfriend/girlfriend/person you like took longer than what you thought they would to reply to your message. Yer that’s being needy, constantly messaging someone until they answer you is also being needy. They aren’t attached to their phone or computer, just because they’re your everything at that point doesn’t mean that they necessarily have time to answer you at the moment.
That being said, when you are in a relationship with someone, if you feel like they are constantly ignoring you, that’s different. You have every right to message them and talk to them about how you are feeling. That is not being needy! You are in a relationship with them, and you should be talking, maybe not all the time, but you need to feel like you are being heard and wanted by your boyfriend/girlfriend.
Another thing that is not being needy is wanting your boyfriend/girlfriend to talk about how they are feeling, to share things with you. I don’t know how many boys actually need their girlfriends to share how they are feeling, us girls usually tend to share what’s on our minds quite willingly, but I do know that a lot of girls struggle with the fact that their boyfriends don’t share how they are feeling. I struggle just with my guy friends not telling me how they are feeling or sharing their issues with me and I’m not even dating the guys. Guys if your girlfriend asks you to share your feelings with her, she’s not being needy, she’s just used to her girlfriends sharing their feelings with her, and she wants you to do the same so that she can be there for you. Girls, you aren’t being needy if you ask your boyfriends occasionally to share their feelings! If you ask them every second message how they feel about a situation, well yeah I think you’ve passed needy 🙂 But so often guys don’t share their feelings, and in a relationship you need them too. Guys I’m talking to you, your girlfriend is not being needy by wanting you to share your feelings occasionally, she wants to be apart of your life.
I’m not saying that you always have to share what you are feeling with your boyfriend/girlfriend, but I am saying that sometimes it’s good to share. Not only for guys but also for us girls. Too often we share the superficial things, and never go any deeper.
I hope that this has cleared up some confusion over being needy, because I know I haven’t sent messages to people in my life because I don’t want to come across needy, but God has said it is not good for us to keep things to ourselves. We need to share them, it’s apart of the call that God has placed on every believers heart to love one another. When we love someone, even as friends, we want to be there for them and to support and care for them, which means sharing with them our struggles and our joys. Take time to share your feelings, whether good or bad, with each other be it friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, parents, or siblings. Take this time to show how much you care about the other person by also listening to them share their feelings.
Have a great week, and I’ll be back next week.